Sunday, January 27, 2013

Working Mom Blues

 I am debating changing the name of my blog. It seems as though it could be slightly dated. I quit my corporate job about seven years ago in the hopes of being an over achieving "stay at home" mom where I would be an expert in the field of "staying at home" to raise amazing children. I envisioned nothing but complete bliss along the way as I cooked meals from scratch, took my children to the library daily, and dried every tear as I hovered freakishly close over my children's lives.

I stayed home about two years then found myself back in the corporate world working part time over the course of the next 4 years. The declining economy suggested I head back to work full time if my children were ever going to get braces, a secondary education, or the ever popular overpriced health insurance. I've been back at work a little over a year and I'm finding the values that I tried so hard to instill upon my children are getting buried under the mess of a busy life as I struggle to pull it all together.

I realize I used to pride myself and my family on the amount of time we spent outdoors, the little almost non existent time playing video games or watching TV. I loved the amount of time we spent reading, cooking, exploring the area, or just playing with toys and finding how to be entertained. Now I find my kids want to do nothing other than play video games and be in front of a screen on the weekend (they are not allowed on weekdays unless of course I have to get a project done for work and need to buy some time- I know, great parenting, go ahead and say it).  Can we go back to where we once were? I crave the old days that seem so far gone. I keep telling my girls that I want to see them, talk to them, listen to them and that I miss them while I'm at work and traveling but I seem to have lost them to the screen. I know I own this mistake and it's going to be a long journey back, I just need to figure out how to recover this mess we are in.